You love your boyfriend. Sometimes it feels like you’re about to burst just from the sheer depth of your adoration. You couldn’t love him more but you’re not perfect. We’ve all done things we regret within our relationships and fortunately in most cases we’re able to fumble our way through and fix things. If you’ve done something now and it just seems as though your boyfriend can’t let it go and he won’t forgive you, that’s a problem that you can’t ignore. If your relationship is teetering on disaster you need to learn how to get a guy back after you messed up. Unless you figure out exactly what to do and then do it, the man is going to pull back so far that saving your relationship won’t be an option anymore.
Understanding how to get a guy back after you messed up is all about recognizing and accepting that your behavior or actions were unacceptable to him. Regardless if you lied to him, called him a nasty name or cheated on him, at the end of the day you still broke his heart. If a man’s heart and pride are injured deeply he’s going to have a lot of trouble letting it go. Men feel emotional pain just as profoundly as we do and if your guy feels that you hurt him deliberately, he’ll hold onto that pain and make some very strong and destructive associations between the pain and you. That’s why you have to just face what you did head on and accept that you really messed up. If you try and excuse away your behavior, it will only make the process of healing that much harder.
An apology is obviously in order but don’t try and present that until he’s calmed down a bit. Attempting to say you’re sorry to a man who is lost in his anger or sadness over what you’ve done will only prove futile. Give things a day or two to settle down and then reach out to him. Make your apology as genuine as you possibly can and own up to what you did. Apologize for causing him to feel what he feels and promise that you’ve learned a big lesson and won’t repeat the same behavior ever again. He may not seem accepting of what you’re saying, but trying to make amends in this way is an important first step.
Also, in order to get a guy back after you messed up you have to show him that you’ve learned a valuable lesson from this experience. That means that whatever you did to cause all of this can’t ever happen again. One of the steps in getting a man to love you again after you’ve made a mistake is to show him that you can make a positive change for him. This can take some time but if you put in the effort and are serious about not hurting him again, the relationship can end up being closer than it’s ever been before.
